10. You think last year's shoes are out of date – this guy’s clothes are 200 year old!
9. Men over fifty are male chauvinists – this guy was born when?
8. Blood breath! Are you really going to kiss me with that stinky mouth?
7. French kissing a corpse – with that breath? A carload of Tic Tacs won’t be enough.
6. Tell me what is sexy about spending all day in a coffin, buried in a graveyard.
5. Men with pale skin and burning red eyes – sexy? No, that’s the reason I stopped dating musicians and drug addicts.
4. I can barely stand to shake a cold clammy living hand – I’m supposed find a cold, clammy embrace sexy?
3. Road kill smells bad after 24 hours, HOW long has this guy been dead? And you can’t SMELL
that?
2. Necrophilia (wanting to have sex with a corpse) is a mental illness – I don’t have it.
1. Live men have erectile dysfunction – you expect me to believe that a corpse can get it up?
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A Very Old Memory
After school at West Junior High I took the bus to West 5th Street. I checked in at the Leeward, where Opal was working behind the bar, ta...
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